Friday, July 6, 2007

In a cup

Yeah so i moved this week. I'm finally out of the family apartment, sort of, and I'm paying extremely cheap rent sharing with two other friends of mine. So the week has been pretty busy.

I also filled the renewal priorities for the renewal of my hack license. hopefully a new hack license will arrive before the current one expires. The drug test was some what interesting. I arrived in a clean looking floor of two waiting rooms. I wasn't sure which room I should wait in, and which secretary I should speak to, or if I should wait on line. There were a few signs posted but none that would actually help.

A man who looked like the delivery guy type, (friendly and short with hair or tatoos on his arms) told me I needed to see the secretary in the larger waiting room. when I stepped up there and signed in with a few others also told by the helpful testee, the woman told me that I would now need to take a seat. I turned back and surveyed the room; all 45 or so seats were taken by people of every shape, size, gender, and creed. About ten more people stood in the narrow hall which linked the two waiting rooms, and 3 or 4 people sat in that room which could hold about 10 more. The ages spanned from 17-60

I waited in the hallway so I could be aware of who was being called up to the window. I had a cup of water by the water cooler. About a year ago when I last took this test, the facility seemed friendly with good service. I was the only one there that year. This year it was Grand Central Station. It was quite ridiculous. I eventually sat in a corner with a few others I presumed to be taxi drivers. I sat there for about 45 minutes when I became anxious that I didn't sign anything except a list on a clip board. The taxi driver next to me told me I needed to fill out a TLC sheet; name, hack number, DOB, all in very large print, it was easy enough.

Most of us all remained silent, and who ever spoke was on stage for all of us. One cabbie talked quite often, turning and directing questions and comments to another cabbie to his right, but that cabbie was intent on tuning him out.

"Boy I could be making money right now. If you ask me its all a sham. I never knew any cabbie to even drink. They just want our money."

He was actually quite friendly, and I hoped he would talk to me, because I don't have enough cabbie friends, probably it's better that I don't.

I waited, and then I waited some more. Then a giant woman came in to sign the sheet for testing. she was about 6 foot 4, and broad shouldered, and was dressed business casual like a few others. A cabbie over at my cabbies corner section told me that since last year they must have gotten contracts with other companies, thus explaining the overcrowding.

Another weird individual came in, he was all dressed in black with white sneakers and black sunglasses. He bobed his head forward with every step he took and his back leaned forward about 10 degrees. He walked up to the window,

"I have an appointment for 2 o'clock." Man

"Sign this sheet and have a seat. Your name will be called." Secretary

"Well how long is it going to be?" Man

"It's going to be a while." Secretary

As the man walks across our stage, the talkative cabbie tells him he's been waiting an hour.

The man in sunglasses and black, goes up several more times:

"Can I smoke?....
In the bathroom?...
uhh.. alright."

"How much longer will it be? Do you know where I am on the list?" He holds up his hack license to the window.

"there are 12 people in front of you." Secretary.

"ahhhhh" he fakes a sigh, "you know?"

He returns to his seperate corner next another veteran cabbie.

So my name was finally called a second time after they checked my licenses for identification. And I got to walk into the office, and turned to speak or try eye contact with the two people with gloves to see who would attend to me. A woman presents me with a cup and tells me to fill it up and not to flush the toilet. I asked her how full she wanted it, because I remember I filled it way too much last year.

A lady yells at an anonymous door, "Sir are you done in there? You've been in there for quite a while."

I walk into my mini toilet room, and place the cup on the top of the toilet tank. Then I selectively alternate between pissing in the cup and the toilet bowl. When I was done, my left hand habitually went for the flusher, but I resisted. I left the room and presented the woman with my cup.

"Is this enough?"

How embarrassing, through the secretary's window about 20 people saw me present my cup of urin.

"Yes." She poured some into a small locking plastic tube. "pour the rest of the cup into the toilet."

I did just that and flushed and made my way to the real world. The sunglasses cabbie told me he'd se me next year.

"The woman still yells at the annonymous door, "Sir, if you want we can call you back when your ready. Are you done in there?"

1 comment:

Michael said...

Hey, man, good luck with your new place and with the license renewal.