Nightmare in Jersey

I waited in line at the Hilton for what seemed like forever this last Saturday, but it was merely an hour. After all the waiting I got a nice reward, Newark Airport, but the luck turned sour, as I got lost in Jersey. This was incredibly embarrassing, frustrating, and anxiety provoking. I had to tell this man that I was lost, he took it rather well, but it was still rather awful. He said he got up a little late and was playing it rather tight. He had to borrow my phone and call his secretary to tell her he would catch a one o’clock flight. Meanwhile I got lost again and again. On the phone with his secretary he kept saying to her in between the yelling, that this poor kid had gotten lost. Well, it was a bummer.

I headed west and figured what the best way to the Lincoln Tunnel was and asked the standard questions; What airline? Domestic? Then I stated it would be the meter fare plus 21. I got to Newark eventually, but when I was in the area, I turned off too early. The sign I turned on said long term parking, but through the black of night, I saw no parking lot. All I saw was a winding road; really all I saw was one white reflective strip, which I followed. I think the white strip was mocking me; it directed me back on the jersey turnpike northbound, to New York City. After about 10 minutes traveling back towards New York I picked a random exit in hope of turning around. We went through the ez pass up an elevated incline, then turned left sharply, sank back down to the earth amidst miscellaneous gas tanks or some type of industrial no man’s land.

I pulled a u-turn to start all over. But after I went through the toll again, I had to make a choice between north and south. I forgot if the sign preceding this indicated south as left or right. I rashly swerved right and unfortunately south was to the left. I told him that I made a mistake yet again. We pretty much were back at the junction of 78 and 95, almost New York City, when I decided to turn around again at an indicated park and ride. I never saw the park nor’ the ride, but wound up seeing signs to route 1 or 9 south. I decided I’d had enough of the turnpike and I take this option. From this point on everything went okay. I gave him the ride for free and he paid me 20 bucks.

All told, the trip took only an hour and fifteen minutes, I don’t know how, because I felt like I would be stuck in Jersey forever. Being lost on a New Jersey Highway is foreign to me because when I get lost, there is no turning back. It is all highways and I can’t just turn around. Every time I made a mistake I had to live with it for miles.