Sunday, November 27, 2011

tide change

greetings, I posted something a while back in August when I was feeling rather glum. The effort required back then to make even half the expected income of a day was too much, and I was feeling it was about time to drop out of the taxi business. There are a lot of things that really fill my mind and set my body into a rhythm that I really love in this career, but the one thing I detest is that the raw capitalist nature of the job has me always thinking about dollars, in effect it puts the driver in a role where they become a slave to their own mind, nobody in particular can really push them around when the driver breaks down all the influences, but earning income based on traffic, customers, overhead costs, and the likelihood of repeat customers, can make a cabbie very crabby indeed. I don't like what I see developing inside myself sometimes. It's like a game of billiards, except instead of seeing with tunnel vision directed at the next ball, it's on the next fare, so many meaningless strategies are attempted and it just feels like a waste of energy and talent.

this season is being much nicer to me in the income sense, the money is coming better than it has in 10 months, but still, I don't want to limit my happiness to the longing for a few more dollars, it feels degrading. And so I'll keep you updated.

I want to have time to devote to bring this blog to a complete site with all the stories i can remember and all the pictures I love, and let it run itself into another photo project. I assume that I'll quit this gig after about 6 years or so, I'll quit in january or february, and grab a few jobs that pay out half the income, but it will drain my energy only to the level of an average citizen, it'll give me time to work on this site. and go to the next step.

4 comments:

Yuriy Akopov said...

Yes, "life is shit, then you die" :(

Good to see your blog updated in my reader once again.

Thank you.

Kalei's Best Friend said...

The fact that you recognize that you need a change is good... Glad you are not just 'settling' like most do... who knows, maybe this change will bring something better and different.. Keep your mind open - things happen for a reason...:-)

NYC taxi photo said...

thanks, yeah that's exactly how I feel. I think I've gotten to the point that no matter what, I need a change. I just told the garage today, I'll be done on january 1st. I feel it's a good new years resolution, in combination with getting another job or two and cleaning my apartment.

it feels weird to notify them, I feel like I'm firing myself, and i know it seems very counterintuitive to be quitting my job in this recession, but my feelings i think count a lot more than the overall economy.

Steve Miller said...

hi nyc taxi photo,

you shouldn't quit this job, I honestly think. the only things you could do instead are being arts or computers. you should try to stick with the job and find a little time on the side probably for something worth the time to be spent on.